I looked in my email inbox. Then I checked Andrew's inbox. Then I combed through the folders in both our accounts before I remembered I'd seen a picture of Julie in whatever the correspondence had been, so, therefore, it must have been her facebook page. I searched through all the Julia's I "know". Then I looked at the friends of several of my friends from church who might know her too.
I let Terry and Donna know the next time I saw them that I was having trouble finding the list, but that I'd be sure to check with Julia at our next meeting.
This is what I humbly had to send to Terry and Donna after meeting with Julie and after asking everyone else on the Ecuador team about the elusive list:
"Don't laugh too hard. The reason I can't find the list of preferred school supplies for the backpack project in Ecuador is because it doesn't exist. I dreamed it. I can still clearly see Julia's facebook page with her picture and the message, but Julia doesn't even have a facebook account. The weirdest part was that Elsa and I both must have either dreamed the same or very similar dreams, because we both remember seeing it. Or something like it. Or Elsa is just extremely kind, and didn't want me to feel TOO dumb.
I searched our emails and my facebook, inputting Julia's name and every variation of it I could imagine, but there was no list, so I brought it up at our meeting Tuesday night. And that's when it came out that not only did Julia not know about a list, nor had she sent any messages about one, but she didn't even have facebook."
After the funny looks, there was some laughter, then some final questions and instructions, and then we looked at each other, excitement on our faces and love in our hearts.
As we stood around all the donated backpacks and water bottles and hats and clothing, holding hands and praying, I could feel the sunshine just pouring in through the windows, bathing my face in warmth and light, like being hugged by God, and I felt honoured and overjoyed at the prospect of GOING, after this recent time of TRUSTING and GROWING. I mentioned it to Andrew as we were getting ready for bed and he laughed and said, no that he hadn't felt the sun's warmth and light because it was overcast. And it was. I remember that the sky was very grey. But not where I was standing. God is so good to know that sometimes I need a hug to know I'm loved.
So, there's no list. And although I can't deliver school supplies, the prayers already offered by so many will deliver love and service exponentially multiplied by God's best for His own. Connections will be made, lives changed, houses built, children loved. And all our lives will never be the same.
"Therefore, my dear brothers stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord. Because you know that your labour in the Lord is not in vain." 1 Corinthians 15:58